Ch 5 and 6 - Some Editing Feedback - Text of an Email

I received a ton of great feedback from several editors so far on Chapters 5 & 6.  Please do your editing (or not!) on your OWN timetable.  I have no schedule for this and do not intend to make corrections on any chapters until I let them sit for a couple months; I want to be able to look at them fresh when I revise.  I am learning a lot and already feel that Chapter 7 is (grammatically at least) much stronger than Chapter 6, and infinitely better than 5.

So, take your time if you are still looking at them.  I do want to summarize some general feedback that everyone so far agrees on.  You don't gotta read it all if you don't wanna, but I keep these emails for my own records.

General Notes:

1. You probably noticed that you found more issues with the beginning of Chapter 5 than any other section.  It is much older and is poorly revised.  I was aware of this when I sent it but wanted to get it into your hands.  I could have re-hashed it forever, but I felt it would be better to get feedback and learn something.
2. Sorry - Chapters 5 through 7 are definitely the foundation of a "minor climax" that occurs at the end of "7".  Some of it may be a little grim and depressing, but I promise the rest of the story is very much NOT like that.
3. This is General Note number three.

What I Am Apparently (Usually) Good At:

1. Transitions between chapters and sections
2. Dialog - I am very pleased with the feedback I got on some of the dialog.  I read that dialog is one of the hardest things for a writer to do well, but I find it enjoyable.  As long as I know the point of the conversation, it seems to flow for me.
3. Characterization of minor characters - Brand and Graedin will develop over Chapters 1 thru 4 and a lot of their physical attributes should be left to the reader's imagination, but minor characters such as the waitress in the Greasy Spork and Samith Raliton (this is the correct spelling!) got some good feedback.

What I apparently Suck At:

1. I sometimes forget to introduce characters, such as Arthe Cral (Rajan's 2nd-in-command) and some of the mercenaries.  Sorry about that...I am making notes.
2. Word use.  I have a list of "bad" words.  They are:
1. "Which"
2. "Had" & "Have" (unless intentionally using passive voice to flash back briefly - VERY briefly)
3. "Um," "Uh," "Look," and "Well," at the beginning of sentences in dialog
4. "Just"
5. Am, Is, Are, Was, Were (and sometimes "Y"?).  Passive voice attached to the action verb sucks!
3. I am addicted to Commas.  I promise I am trying to break the habit.
4. Rambling unnecessarily about things the reader doesn't give a crap about, like which compass direction the river flows.
5. Inconsistent use of italics.  This really annoys Lauren.  After reading her comments the italics started to annoy me too.  I will try to restrain myself.

Things I Don't Usually Suck At Because I Have Been Trying To Pay Attention To Them:

1. Use of passive voice - the Achilles Heel of the amateur novelist.
2. Split Infinitives - I love the phrase "Split Infinitive".  I think I'll make a new Bean Man villain and name him that.
3. Trying too hard to be funny.  I'm funnier when I don't force it.

Did I forget any of my major problems?  Enjoy your reading!